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Bromides And Sulfites Essay Writing

"Blurb" came from "bromide"-- actually, from Burgess' book "Are You a Bromide?" For the jacket of a special edition of his book, Burgess drew an illustration of a glamorous young woman and gave it a breathless caption. He named the woman "Miss Blinda Blurb," and eventually "blurb" became the word for lavish praise on book flaps.

Since "bromide" and "blurb" have had such useful lives, it's a shame the English language couldn't make room for Burgess' even more delightful creations, which he offered in his dictionary, "Burgess Unabridged."

Proudly vowing to "give the diction of the year ," Burgess not only listed and defined his words, he included a full page of commentary and an eight-line poem for each one. "We have no [French] Academy, thank heaven, to tell us what is real English and what isn't," Burgess wrote in his introduction. "We need so many new words, and we need 'em quick."

Burgess urged readers to try his words out. "Little by little," he wrote, "as their sharp corners and edges are worn smooth by use, they will fit into your conversation and nestle into place, making your talk firmer, more expressive and wonderfully adequate to your daily needs."

So to honor his memory today, try using one of these lexical treasures Burgess invented with no success -- at least so far.

agowilt: "sickening terror." The feeling you have the instant you have done something without considering the dire consequences. "The minute after you throw the burnt match into the waste-paper basket," Burgess wrote, "the agowilt comes."

alibosh: blatant lie or exaggeration. When your boss or your curfew-defying teen tells you a whopper today, you know what to call it.

bimped: to be jilted or cheated out of something. The would-be husband of the runaway bride or the customer who gets a nickel back instead of a quarter can say, "I got bimped."

bripkin: one who puts forth mediocre effort. "The bripkin invites a girl to the theatre, but he takes her in a street-car -- on a rainy night, too!" Burgess explained.

cowcat: "a person whose main function is to occupy space." Of the many possibilities, Burgess suggested, "Your wife's relatives?"

diabob: garishly ugly decoration; kitsch. Burgess rhymed, "This object made of celluloid, This thing so wildly plushed, How grossly Art has been annoyed, How Common Sense has blushed!"

frime: a reliable, thoughtful person. "The frime knows when you are hungry, when you are thirsty and when you would be let alone," Burgess wrote.

gloogo: a person who displays notable loyalty and devotion to a task, thing, or another person.

"You are a gloogo if you read Burgess Unabridged all the way through," Burgess wrote.

gubble: meaningless social chatter.

huzzlecoo: private conversation between friends, business people, or flirts.

igmoil: a bitter dispute over money.

jirriwig: a traveler who ignores, or is indifferent to, dazzling surrounding sights.

kipe: to scrutinize with jealousy or contempt. "Up and down, from hat to heel, women kipe each other insolently as they pass," Burgess wrote.

lallify: to delay; to painstakingly extend. "The preacher, barren of fresh thoughts, lallifies his meager sermon," Burgess wrote.

looblum: something enjoyable but harmful. "Human nature," Burgess wrote, "woos the looblum."

mooble: unremarkable attempts at greatness. "Moobly novels are written by -- well of course you know already," Burgess said.

oofle: "a person whose name you cannot remember."

paloodle: person who provides unwanted advice or information.

quisty: useful but not beautiful.

quoob: person whose behavior is constantly out of place. "If you are a natural born quoob, you are the only one of all the audience to applaud, or cheer," Burgess wrote.

rizgidget: state of indecisiveness.

skyscrimble: to go off topic, obliviously or evasively.

tashivate: "to reply without attention." What readers of this article may currently be doing to their chattering spouses.

unk: a gift that is not wanted or appropriate.

vilp: one who wins or loses in bad form, either gloating or making excuses.

whinkle: disingenuous or manipulative politeness. Burgess wrote: "How whinkles the pallid clerk at his employer's jokes."

yowf: "one whose importance exceeds his merit."

E-mail Nathan Bierma at onlanguage@woaknb.wz.sk

- - -

Is that a purple cow?

Humorist and illustrator Frank Gelett Burgess was born Jan. 30, , in Boston and died Sept. 17, , in Carmel, Calif.

Some may recall Burgess wrote about ill-mannered children called Goops, but he's best known for this little verse:

I never saw a purple cow,

I never hope to see one;

But I can tell you, anyhow,

I'd rather see than be one.

The purple cow stuck in so many minds that Burgess was driven to create this verse in self-defense:

Ah, yes! I wrote the "Purple Cow"

I'm Sorry, now, I Wrote it!

But I can Tell you, Anyhow,

I'll Kill you if you Quote it!

Source: The Columbia World of Quotations.

The comparison in texts is amazing. few words vs an essay. wow

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